The 10 Commandments for Clean Toilets

A sacred guide for bathroom keepers everywhere.

We at Poop Advisor believe every human deserves a decent place to do their business. These are the non-negotiable rules every establishment should live by.

I. Thou Shalt Never Run Out of Toilet Paper

This is not a suggestion. This is survival. If your dispenser is empty, someone's day just got significantly worse.

II. Thou Shalt Provide Soap That Actually Works

A sad, empty soap dispenser is a crime against hygiene. Bonus points if it doesn't smell like a hospital from 1987.

III. Thou Shalt Keep the Floor Dry

Nobody wants to play "is that water?" in their nice shoes. Mop regularly. Let people pee in peace, not in puddles.

IV. Thou Shalt Fix the Lock

A broken lock turns a private moment into a public event. Fix it. Today. Not next week.

V. Thou Shalt Ensure Proper Ventilation

If the smell hits before the door opens, you've already lost. A window, a fan, an air freshener — pick at least one.

VI. Thou Shalt Empty the Bin

An overflowing bin is not a modern art installation. Empty it before it becomes a health hazard.

VII. Thou Shalt Provide Adequate Lighting

People need to see what they're doing — and where they're sitting. A flickering fluorescent tube doesn't count.

VIII. Thou Shalt Maintain the Flush

If it takes three attempts and a prayer, the flush is broken. Fix the mechanism. Respect the flush.

IX. Thou Shalt Not Neglect Accessibility

Accessible toilets are not storage rooms. Keep them clear, equipped, and actually accessible for the people who need them.

X. Thou Shalt Care About the Vibe

A clean toilet is the minimum. A good toilet has decent lighting, no weird stains on the ceiling, and maybe — just maybe — a plant. You'd be surprised how far a little effort goes.

---

Think an establishment is breaking the commandments? Rate their throne.